My Apologies

I say "thank you"

To disguise my selfishness

My gratitude is derived from my own indulgence

I don’t really know

Anything

I have great fantasies

That write poems on the lives of others

My mind is full of boxes

Still life photographs, filed neatly

Thoughts waiting to be admired

Breathless moments

Smells, tastes, textures

electric sensations that run through my breasts

Glimpses of secrets

Glimpses of tangled bodies and hair

A knowing

Feeling

A surrendering of sorts

Sounds of breathy voices

Speaking eloquent words

To use and abuse, for my own agenda

My conflict comes over the dichotomy

Between perception

And the confines of reality

I cave in, again, to my fantasy

 There is a wild beast inside of me

And that is not becoming of a lady