Midnight Poem

I have things to say

Nothing original 

You know that already

I like how well you know that 

I am not profound 

I called myself a writer 

I let you read what I wrote too 

I recited my works aloud 

For you 

To hear them in my voice; and that is my why 

I take the time 

To take the time 

Be Still is my mantra 

So, I tell you everything, I feel 

Every feeling becomes more real 

I take your picture 

So I can continue on loving you 

I can keep you, seeing you 

The way you once looked 

At me 

Your eyes glassy with truths 

Only I can see 

I tell you, I feel every ounce of it 

The weight you carry 

Makes me want to hold you more 

A person cannot live their whole entire life 

Without soup 

That is not a life worth living 

There is so much 

I didn’t not know 

I get perspective. 

So many 

People are more gifted than me, or less 

And, I have everything In life 

Or I have nothing 

Depending on the day, both 

Glass can be blown under a flame 

Or it can shatter when you let go 

Love whispers and waits 

Beauty waiting to born, it cannot be 

Kept safely at a distance 

So I will be a dream chaser 

I will also go nowhere 

And dream of what will come to me 

There is no reason 

I just will 

And now it is already 

Tomorrow

Ode to Manchego

Oh how I crave you, dear Manchego 

I long for your nutty richness 

On my tongue 

My Sweetness, you are delicate in nature 

You are a lover in my mouth 

I hunger for more of you each day 

I no longer can deny 

How you complement the seediness 

Of my cracker 

You give more than I deserve 

You are a well aged 

Beauty Sophisticated, cultured and refined 

So good, you come from the finest breed 

I will travel miles for you 

You never disappoint me 

Faithful and true, aged to perfection 

Unassuming in your greatness 

My dreams make me ache for you 

Full bodied, only you can deliver 

Everything I need 

Wise one, I thank you for your presence 

You fill my indulgent desires with your rustic woody notes

My love-longing satisfied with your fat 

Mi Corazón, mi queso Manchego 

Together, we make the perfect pairing

Menstruation

I love you who challenges me
Just hours before the pink moon rises
You bring me your crimson gift
Flowing rose petals flutter between my thighs
You arrive

When you’re around
Liquid flows from my body in various forms
Tears of vulnerability
Flow freely
I float in salted water and my elements

I spend time reflecting
Horizontal in my position
When I stand, I’m reminded of your presence
Because you run from me
Violently

I am a blooming rose, spectacular and beautiful
Red blood pumping through my heart
Blood red running down my legs
Swollen uterus, empty womb
I embrace this life of bleeding

At 43, I hug my emptiness
Soon I won’t ride these waves again
No longer do I desire to be full with baby, full in breast
You and I will say goodbye
I wait for the day that I am my own again

Ode To Christa

Oh, glorious Christa

You are to be celebrated

Sweet in your manner, usually

You smell like lavender flowers, mint and patchouli 

I love how you cut your bangs without permission

I also love the way you resist patriarchy too

There is so much to love about you

Your wit, sincerity and wandering soul

A woman of depth, strength and fire

I love to see you grow

We have created meaningful memories

Even if your husband disapproves of me

You bake the best cookies, brownies

And now you bake my banana bread recipe

So charmingly, in your apron, you bake in your kitchen

I crave your lentils; your charismatic legumes

When I hold your baby girl, I want her

Because she is part of you

You plant strawberries in your garden

Later, I see your blossoms bloom

One year ago today we met

I cannot promise an ode each year

No matter time or space

We shall be sisters, my kindred spirit

You are extraordinary in so many ways

I hope you know it

You radiant, glowing, woman that belongs to no one

This is my way of showing

My love for you will never stop growing

Until

The End

Untitled

There is so much 

Love to love

I feel the space

Between us 

To do just that

Feeling feelings

Is my way of living,

My way of freedom

I've always maintained

I cannot be contained

My mind wanders 

I refuse to label my humaness

I will just own 

Who I am 

And, still you love me

Fully

More than I could know

I exist in the wilderness

Floating in the thickness of the clouds

Resisting the ground that calls me back

Why do I love you so?

Every time, the answer is

Because you love me first

For my whole life

I will choose

You

My Process

If you have never been lonely
You are more alone
Than me

If all your time is full
You are not your own
Best Friend

If you've never doubted
If you've never wondered, wandered
You don't know where home really is

If life is too easy
You haven't lived
One minute

If you don't question everything
You have nothing
Real

If you haven't been restless
You are not well
Rested

I've been both dead, and alive
Second chances
Are my way of life

I wonder, I wander
I search, I seek
I keep on living, keep on loving

Whispers of judgments
Hover in the air
Surrounding my freedom

I've gotten so skilled
Learning to reject
What doesn't serve me well

It's not easy to accept
All of my
Freedom

I will keep going
Where the green grass is greener
I will be a dream chaser

All of my life
I will soak up, I will soak in
The sun

It's the sun that keeps calling
Again each morning
I wake up

To live

Untitled

I am not afraid of your pain
I am not afraid of your tears
I am not afraid of your sickness
I am not afraid of your sadness

I am not afraid of your giftedness
I am not afraid of what you read
I am not afraid of what you write
I am not afraid of your mind

I am not afraid of your art
I am not afraid of your song

I am not afraid of your friends
I am not afraid of your children
I am not afraid of your husband
I am not afraid of your marriage or divorce

I am not afraid of your addictions
I am not afraid of your money
I am not afraid of your power
I am not afraid of your beauty

I am not afraid of your race
I am not afraid of your racism
I am not afraid of your gender
I am not afraid of your sexuality

I am not afraid of your religion
I am not afraid of your spirituality

I am not afraid of your past
I am not afraid of your healing
I am not afraid of your loneliness
I am not afraid of  your fear

I am not afraid of man
I am not afraid of God

I am not afraid to dream
I am not afraid for our future
I am not afraid to sit with you
I am not afraid to let you go

I am not afraid of Love

I have lived
I have died
I have been torn down
I have been built up

Crumbled and melted
I have been refined by fire
Refreshed by water
Grounded in my roots
Lungs full of breath
Recreated, I have been reborn into beauty

I am
Fearless and free

I will love in all ways
I will love completely
I won't stop what flows
So freely

This is me